Homeschool Review Crew - Color My Conversation Northern Speech Services

I was thrilled to get a chance to review the Color My Conversation (CMC) from Northern Speech Services (NSS) which is basically weeks of speech therapy instruction focusing on conversation social skills coaching in a box where I, as the parent teacher, became the conversation coach for my child. It can be used with professional speech therapists, teachers, or parents in a group or one-on-one setting and works especially well with high-functioning Asperger children. Though, any child would benefit from its use.

What is the Color My Conversation CMC from Northern Speech Services NSS?

Color My Conversation is a program that was developed by a speech-language pathologist and is intended to teach children to develop social conversation skills. It takes a multi-sensory approach and is easy to adapt to any child's needs. The program is designed to be used over a 14 to 16 week time period but can be adapted as needed for shorter or longer timeframes, even up to an entire year with each session lasting between 30 to 45 minutes at least once per week along with at-home practice throughout the week. The program uses color coding, sign language, gestures, songs, and other hands-on and interactive learning style techniques. The program is intended to be used with children ages K-7th Grade.

I received a complete kit that was packed with everything I needed to implement the course. It included a CD instruction manual and a music CD, a yellow ball that came deflated and needed to be inflated, rubber mat colored stepping stones and lightning rods (12 total), 50 game tokens, a cloth ribbon that is about 9 1/2 ft. long, 100 picture/emotion cards, 2 dry erase pens, 50 dry erase wall display cards, a poster, and a game board,

The kit includes video tutorials with an instructor who was pleasant to listen to and easy to understand:

The lessons come with video instruction that includes:

Begins with what they call the Yellow Conversation (basically hello goodbye). It continues into the Short Conversation (green and red stones) with basic chit chat. It then moved into long conversations (blue stones).  These beginner lessons are complete with instructions for the teacher/parent on how to implement them.

It then moves into the intermediate level which covers the basics of conversation, such as the WHO WHAT WHERE WHEN WHY's, making transitions from one topic to another, body language, and wraps it all up by making a color beaded bracelet that correlates with the stepping stones and conversational flow.

From here, it finishes up with a more advanced conversation that discusses body language, the tone of voice, "bubbles" of thought conversation, and face-to-face communication practice. The program concludes with expertise level skills.

There is also a section on using the program with special needs children.

Finally, there is a section within the expert level that helps develop critical thinking, character development, integrity, and leadership skills and using what they have learned in the real world with real-life face-to-face conversations.

The yellow ball is really fun to use for the beginner and part way through the intermediate level. It is suggested that you stop using it by lesson 7.

The game pieces, cards, game boards, and floor mats are used throughout the lessons.

 

There are also worksheets for the coach and the child to complete and wall displays.

And, an assessment rubric.

How Did We Use It?

I was interested in using this with my 10-year-old who has not officially been diagnosed as autistic but demonstrates some borderline characteristics, as does her older brother, mostly when it comes to social interaction with her peers and some sensory issues.  I began by watching the introduction instructional videos and looking over the manual before I did anything with my daughter with the program. I soon learned that most of the beginner level lessons dealt with more basic forms of conversation that she really has already mastered for the most part, so I touched on these briefly and moved into the intermediate lessons rather quickly. As silly as it may sound, the part that took me the longest was figuring out how to get ahold of a ball pump to pump up the ball.

We wrote on the dry erase mats, but for some reason the black marker didn't show up well in the pictures.

I started her at the beginner level but quickly moved into the intermediate lessons as she was comfortable with the concepts at the beginner level. As I watched the instructional tutorial videos, I decided that my daughter would be most receptive to delving into these social communications lessons if I incorporated them into her language arts lessons a few times a week.

I also thought my older son could benefit from this but knew he was too old to willingly sit through the lessons. So, as I was watching the instructional videos, he asked about it and it opened up the door for me to share with him some of the concepts which he surprisingly was excited about grasping.

What Did We Think?

First, I love anything that includes color coding. It's how I think and seems to be how a couple of my children think as well. Another thing I love is the feel of the ball. It is smooth and the perfect size. This may seem like no big deal, but when you deal with sensory issues in children that can create melt downs, this is a HUGE deal. I was pleased to see how excited my daughter got when she saw the package arrive. I had told her nothing about it and wasn't sure how she would respond. I found it to be an interesting and fun way to teach social conversation. The instructor's voice was pleasant to listen to which made it easier to follow. I especially liked that it was hands-on and active. The part I had the most trouble with is figuring out the sign language used. I'm sure if I was using it with a group, this would be something I would work on more. Also, the music is a nice addition especially for groups, with the gathering song, etc. and also for smaller children.

FIND NORTHERN SPEECH SERVICES ON SOCIAL MEDIA @:

Facebook (company): www.facebook.com/northernspeech 
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YouTube: www.youtube.com/northernspeech 
Instagram: www.instagram.com/northernspeechservices/

Read what other members of the Homeschool Review Crew thought by clicking on the picture below:

TOS Review: Happy Kids Songs

I was happy to review Happy Kids Songs Workbook: Hands-On Activities to Build Character, Social And Emotional Skills (Retail price $13.95, currently available for $12.56)
from Happy Kids Songs. Additionally, I received 15 songs total as music downloads from three of their eight available CD sets. The music is by Dr. Mac and Friends and are sung by children and adults. Each set is available for $4.95, or .99 per song:

Friends and Sharing (Set 1)

Happiness and Attitude (Set 5)



Manners and Character (Set 6)

The book and CDs are geared toward children ages 3-8, but don't be surprised if children 0-9 also enjoy them. I used it with my 7-year-old daughter.

We especially enjoyed the Six Little Kids song on the Manners & Character CD, which is basically the story of the blind men and the elephant, where each describe the elephant as something different based upon his perspective.






The rest of the songs are as follows:

Friends and Sharing (Set 1)

1. Sailing on the Seven C's - This is a catchy tune that talks about the ingredients of friendship.
2. Everybody Wants to Find a Friend - This song is about reaching out to others.
3. Sharing Friends - This song is about including others in play time.
4. Happy as Happy Can Be - This song is about being happy with a friend.
5. Together - This song expresses how to say good bye.

Happiness and Attitude (Set 5)

1. Shake it Out and Dance - A song about developing an "I can" attitude as opposed to saying, "I can't".
2. Who Knows What's a Kudo? - Learning how to give a compliment.
3. I Don't Understand - Learning to understand and how to handle limitations.
4. Be Good To Yourself - A song about kindness and learning the steps to being happy.
5. Better Together - A relationship song about preferring to be with a friend than being alone.

Manners and Character (Set 6)

1. H-O-N-E-S-T-Y - This song expresses the value of honesty.
2. The Magic Word - This song is about learning manners.
3. Quirks - This song is about learning to appreciate differences.
4. The Golden Rule - This song is about consideration of others.
5. Six Little Kids - This song is about honoring other perspectives.

I don't know if it's true in other homeschools or just ours, but the big SOCIALIZATION word makes me cringe. One thing that these songs are great for is that they are a fun way to help our children reach out and really be a friend to someone and hopefully make a friend in return.

Another nice thing about the songs is that they are not all the same tempo, rhythm, genre, or style. Some of the songs have children singing them, which give them a sound off of a kids' show, but the styles are really varied. There are some that have a bluesy or jazzy feel while others are more of rap, hip hop, Broadway musical, techno or even a folksy feel.

    

   

The approximately 80-page workbook was really fun as well and has activities that corresponds to the songs to reinforce the lessons learned about character, friendship, manners, sharing, talking, and listening and more appropriate social behavior and socialization skills. The workbook covers all eight albums, including a total of 40 songs.

Find Happy Kids Songs on Facebook, Twitter @Howsyourfam and YouTube.

Read what other members of the Crew thought:

How Do They Compare: Homeschool v. Public School?

I came across this interesting infographic today. As a homeschooler, I found it quite encouraging. What do you think?



Created by: CollegeAtHome.com

Does Homeschooling Leave You Stuck At Home?

Ask most homeschoolers I know, and you'll get a quick reply something like this:

Hah!  As a homeschooler, I am on the go more than I think I would be had I decided to send my child to a private or public school!

Most homeschoolers seem to understand that, similar to the decision to become a stay-at-home or work-at-home mom, homeschooling is sort of an oxymoron of terms.  Yes, the home is the place where most instruction takes place, at least legally in my state. However, homeschoolers also feel the pressure to socialize their children.

As a homeschooling parent, I provide everything for my children that a separate school would provide.  At least, I try. Sometimes I feel pressured, and often the activities I choose to fill the gaps are pricey. But, feeling stuck at home?  At least, for me this is never a problem.

I'll let the infographic do the rest of the talking, because quite frankly, the statistical information included is quite interesting.

What do you think?

Source: BestMastersinEducation.com

Is Lack of Socialization the Same as Shyness?

She said it!  In a recent phone conversation I had with our new dance instructor.  She said it.  The word that makes me cringe.

Suggesting that her children are not properly socialized is enough to get up the ire of any parent, but to a homeschooler, these are not words you want to hear.  But, she said it.

Oh, the teacher was not trying to be offensive.  In fact, she was trying to be nice in a round-about way.  But, she said it; and, I'm having trouble letting it go.

If you have followed my blog, or know me, at all then you know how hard it was for my girls to transition from a long-time dance instructor to a new studio.  We would never have switched, but the life-long instructor retired and moved onto a career as an administrator at her own daycare center.

She was a wonderful teacher, and I shed probably more tears than my girls when I discovered almost a decade of dance instruction, as we knew it, was coming to an end.

We managed, by the grace of God, to finally land at a studio we really like.  The instructor is also very nice.  But, she said it.

In the phone conversation, this new dance instructor was saying how happy she is that the girls are seeming more relaxed and happy around her.  She was complimenting them.  But, she said it.

She went on to say, "Because your girls are homeschooled..."

Stop!

There's the intro right there that made me cringe.  And, it continued...

"They're not used to having many different teachers, like children who attend 'regular' school.  And, they were - because of that - perhaps, a little more shy to open up to the other girls in the class as well."

Gulp!

Socialization and Shy in the same sentence.

So, what do I do with that?

Of course, I will deal with it - Even try to forgive this comment.  But, it digs deep and makes me feel as if she will always see my girls through glasses that paint them as socially awkward, shy and not in with the 'regular' group.

This does more than trigger a hurtful nerve in me.  It makes me realize that she is not educated in the benefits of homeschooling in regard to socialization.  However, if it is beneficial to homeschool a child for reasons of socialization; then, why isn't it evident in my girls?

It makes me sad.
It makes me wish I had never ever mentioned to her that they are homeschooled, but she point blank asked.
It makes me question if my girls really are shy.  See, to me they are far from shy.  As I told her, once she finally gets my youngest to come out of her shell, she will want to stuff her back in.  This child is hilarious, bright, clever, and often becomes full of unspun energy and chatter.

My older daughter appears to be sweet, quiet and perhaps even shy.  However, this is the same girl who doesn't stop talking at times.  Most recently, we timed her words on the way home from a family gathering:

240 words spoken in one minute!

So, is that the works of shy children?

Shyness hits a personal nerve for me, because growing up I was often mistaken for being shy.  It hurt for one reason, and one reason only - Because the person who would call me shy really thought it was an inferior trait.

In my growing up and maturity, I discovered that there is a difference between being shy and being quiet and being reserved and being thoughtful and gentle.  I soon determined that while I am usually a quiet person, I am far from shy.

I don't want my girls to be wrongly perceived in this way either.  And, it bothers me that homeschooling is associated with shyness, awkwardness, immaturity and lack of socialization skills.  Yet, if my children really do lack confidence, I need to address that issue.  So, when a dance teacher reminds me that she sees my children as being shy and that this, in her mind, is because they are homeschooled - I'm not sure what to do with that.

Socializing my Child

Socialization and homeschooling.  It's quite often a touchy subject that isn't always easily discussed without someone getting his or her feelings hurt. Maybe it's an underlying guilt or insecurity in homeschool parents that make it this way.  Regardless, this year's goal for me is to focus on socialization of one child, in particular.

My oldest child turned 13 this year, and for the past 13 years has captivated me with his brilliance.  OK, sure, right - Doesn't every mother say this about her son?

It's true.  I had seen other newborns before him.  I had plenty of nieces and nephews, and babysat tons.  I even worked at an Academy for Children and the church nursery.  I had looked into the eyes of numerous babies before I had my own.

But something struck me that day when the nurse placed my newborn son into my arms.  I looked into his eyes, and he did not return a glared, empty newborn look.  No, his was one of the deepest, most profound looks I had ever seen in a baby's eyes.

He looked back at me with this look that seemed to ask, "Can I trust you?  Will you take good care of me?"

It took me by surprise, and I was captivated and determined to give my son everything he needed to grow and be healthy physically, mentally and spiritually.

• From that moment, this child has continued to amaze me.
• He learned to read when he was 3, pulling me along every step of the way.
• He has a bright sense of humor that rivals stand-up comedians
• He somehow grasps adult-level concepts when overhearing conversations, or even the evening news.
• He devours college level computer instruction books and has self-taught himself the basics of many computer languages, including HTML, HTML5, Visual Basic, C#, Java and DOS.

This child never ceases to amaze me, except in one area, that is: Socializing with peers

When it comes to joining in and reaching out to make friends, this child shrinks back.  He transforms from a chest-puffed out, speaking loudly with confidence brilliant funny man to mumbling, soft speech and insecure fears while touting that everything he has to share is stupid or that others will laugh at it.

Where does this abrupt shyness come from?

Of course, I go down the list wondering if I have given him the best I could by choosing to homeschool him.  On numerous occasions, I have considered enrolling him in a private or even public school just for the socialization.

But, then I am reminded just as abruptly - usually by him - that this would not be his best option.

So, this year my goal is to socialize my son.  It is my ambition to get him involved in any activity that he shows even the least bit of interest in and surround him with like-minded kids his age or older, getting him away from younger kids who tend to follow him around on playgrounds wanting to be his buddy.

He needs a good friend who isn't into sports and isn't rambunctious.  This boy just is not into typical boy things.

He needs a good friend who is like-minded in computer gaming and technology enough to have some meaningful conversation.

When I look back into his eyes at the end of this school year, I want them to look back at me without the questioning concern of his newborn days.  I want him to look back at me with confidence and shine forth the young man God made him to be.

Homeschool Socialization: Vacation Swim Buddies

And this is how socialization is done...As I sit watching my kids swim, I'm struck by how easy it can be for kids to make friends - well at least vacation swim buddies.

My youngest doesn't really have the hang of swimming entirely yet. However, she's getting mighty bold in her Disney Princess on one side, and permanent marker mama-drawn cartoon elephant on the other swim inflatable ring. She also refuses to go down a water slide.  That didn't matter to her new friend. 

As my three kids were enjoying the waterpark, in walks a little girl about my youngest daughter's age. My older two were busy going down the slide time and time again, and my littlest went over to enjoy the kiddie park. 

That's when it happened:  socialization - you know the big "s" word you're warned your child will never receive enough of. 

Well, it happened - Without any classrooms filled with peers. 

It happened, without any lines to stand straight in, waiting. 

It happened.  Without changing classrooms to the sound of a bell. 

It happened without a teacher to show her how. 

It happened without any prompting, and without a mama pulling her sheepishly crying and clinging from behind a long denim skirt.

Right there, in the hotel waterpark, my daughter was socializing. 

And, it happens everyday.  Homeschooled children, thought to be overprotected hermits, actually meet, talk to and socialize with other children without a classroom of 30 other children telling them how. 

I realize there's sometimes more to those well-meaning worried comments about socialization, but if the worry is that a child will be holed up in a tower like Rapunzel for 18 years, let me set your mind at ease...

I care very little if my children ever learn that they are accepted in a particular class or group because of their income level or the clothing they choose to wear.

I care very little if my children ever learn that they are not good enough because a teacher or a bully told them what their "proper" place is in the school ranks of hierarchy.

I care very little if my children ever learn that their hair is the wrong color, they don't have the proper piercings, or tattoos to fit in.

I care very little if my children ever learn that they are the best merely because they made the cheerleading squad.

I care very little if my children ever learn that they are special because they made the cut into the "smart kids" "accelerated program".

I care very little if my children ever learn that they are nobody because they weren't invited to the prom.

I care very little if my children ever learn how to ride a school bus.

I care very little if my children ever learn how they rank among their peers academically, socially, athletically, or in any other regard.

Because none of this is reality in the real world after high school.

The kind of socialization that I want for my children happens.  It happens naturally and sometimes in a hotel waterpark.

Is Bullying the Reason You Homeschool?

Why do you homeschool?  Does it have anything to do with a bully?

Many homeschoolers choose to keep their children at home because of an experience with a bully:  Either the parent was bullied as a kid, or their child has experienced bullying.

When I was asked to review a book recently, it dawned on me that I could address the issue of bullying even more extensively than the book had done.  I wrote about it here:

Back To School Back To Bullies!

No, it's not my entire reason for homeschooling, but I'm sure bullying plays a part in my decision.

Getting personal, I will admit that part of the reason I decided to homeschool probably has something to do with boarding a bus.  I remember learning to survive on a bus.  By the time I was a Junior in High School, I boarded a bus with my best friend.  However, when I returned home from school, she was not on the bus because she had a job and was part of a high school work program.  So, I was on my own.  Thankfully, I found a bus buddy who I still cherish to this day.

Backing up a few years, my dad was starting out in his career and getting promoted frequently.  By the time I was in 6th grade, I was entering my 6th public school.  I actually loved this new school every year pattern.  I was always the new kid on the block and always welcomed with joy.  I also loved school.  I had no trouble making friends.  ...Until we moved to St. Louis.

The year we moved to this new city, I was in 5th grade.  I would not enter the school year halfway through, being the new kid and introduced like some kind of treasure to the class, but rather I would start the first day of school in the fall along with everyone else.  I blended in like I was part of the crowd.  But, inside of me, I didn't blend in at all.

It was in 5th grade that I would meet my best friend for life, which was a joy.  It was also, however, in 5th grade that I would experience bullying from an unexpected source - A teacher.

I had a teacher who, for some reason we have never figured out, had it in for me.  

• She insisted that I was not wearing my glasses - I didn't wear any.
• She pulled me physically by the shirt to yank me out of the doorway to the classroom because I had run into the class when the bell rang, and she had been standing at the doorway talking with another teacher.  Apparently, I had run in between their conversation.  To this day, I still cower when there is no way avoiding walking in between two people in a doorway...  Even though, they are blocking the way.
• She called me out at a school camp, shaking me and screaming at me because I had wandered away from the class, who were feeding chickens.  I was a bit frightened by the chickens.

On top of this, I entered this school not knowing anything about inclusive classrooms.  The public school was trying to integrate special school district children into the classroom.  This sounds like a wonderful concept.  However, no one explained to me that this boy, who was the size of a large man, had thick glasses, talked with a deep groaning voice and shuffled his feet when he walked was a special school student who was being integrated into the mainstream classroom to learn alongside mainstream students.  

In no way do I mean this in anything other than the truth - But, this boy scared me.  I had never seen anyone with a special need in my own classroom before.  Please - Integration is a grand idea!  I do not know what his special need was, but if someone had explained to me that whatever he was suffering from was not something I could catch, like a cold, it would have been helpful.  He scared me, and the teacher set his desk right next to mine - Touching my desk, completely lined up side-by side.

This boy would take his pencil and tap - tap - tap it on top of my head the entire time the teacher spoke.  The teacher did nothing.  And, me?  I was too scared, and didn't want to hurt this boy's feelings, to ask him to stop.

At the end of my 5th grade school year, toward the last day of school when I was feeling relieved that I would not be seeing this teacher ever again, this same teacher stood up and scared the living daylights out of us all.  She began to tell us how in Middle School, 6th grade, we would be forced to take showers during gym class with everyone watching.  I don't remember anything else she said because I was shaking with fear all summer worrying about what 6th grade would be like...  It was nothing like she had terrified me into believing.

I say all that to say this, bullying comes in many forms.  Sometimes it comes from a fellow classmate, and sometimes it comes from a person in a position of authority - a teacher, a parent, a pastor - who should know better.  Even though I had never heard of homeschooling at that time, and of course I have a whole slew of additional reasons as to why I educate my children at home, but I think 5th grade sealed the deal for me for homeschooling in terms of socialization and bullying.

I know of no better way to arm my children to stand up to a bully but to lay for them a solid foundation of love, instilling confidence and spiritual soundness.  My philosophy has always been:

I wouldn't throw a baby, who doesn't even know how to swim, into an ocean filled with sharks.  Even if it isn't as drastically abusive, the same is true with throwing my babies into an environment like I experienced in the 5th grade.

So, how about you?  Does bullying play any part in your homeschooling decision?

A New Twist on the Homeschooler Socialization Question

Let's chat a minutes - Just homeschooling mom to homeschooling mom (or dad):

I'm not always quick to tell people that we homeschool until I feel comfortable about their viewpoints about educating children at home.  However, recently when I have mentioned it to others I have noticed that there is a new twist on the homeschooler socialization question.

Instead of the expected:  "Oh, what do you do about socialization?" question, I am now noticing that there is a new twist on this inquiry.

Today, while waiting for my daughters to start a dance performance, I struck up a conversation with one of the other mothers.  Sure, we see each other every week at dance class.  But, we never really talk long enough to find out about who the other one is and what we are all about.

The topic came up today because she asked what my husband did for a living.  I told her that he is a musician.  He teaches guitar lessons, and he also performs.  This evolved into talking about odd schedules and how we never eat at a normal time, and we never go to bed at a normal time.

Since I had already stepped off the diving board and was headed for the deep end, I figured I might as well explain why I was ok with a odd bedtime.  So, I threw it out there:  "Oh, we also homeschool which works around my husband's schedule since we tour with him out of town as well."

What was her very next question?

No - It wasn't, "what do you do about socialization?"  It was the new twist on this question:

Like many other inquisitive listeners of late, she asked:

"Are you part of any homeschool group, then?"

So, there you have it.  It's a new subtle way to slip in what she really wanted to know, and that is whether or not my kids actually encounter other children their own age on a day-to-day basis during school.

I need to come up with an appropriate response, because this new twist on the socialization question sort of threw me off guard.

Have you encountered this new twist on the socialization question?  How do you answer it?

Is Your Parenting an Epic Fail Experience?

Have you ever had one of those weeks?  OK, let's be real, have you ever felt like everything you do as a parent is an epic fail?  There are moments when this is all I feel, and these last few weeks have been filled with tons of epic fail experiences.

In no significant order, allow me to ramble.  Perhaps something will trigger a spark with you as well where you can relate.  Or, better yet, where you can be encouraged knowing you are not alone and perhaps pull some sliver of hope out of my failures.

Let's start with the big word "Socialization!"  OK, perhaps this hits a nerve with me because growing up I hated it when someone would call me shy.  Yes, I was a quiet kid.  But shy?  Reallly?  I never thought of myself as shy.  To me, quiet and shy were quite different.  Just because I was not rowdy and obnoxiously loud did not mean I had nothing to offer.  And, it has always bothered me when people disregard someone saying they are shy as if it is a horrible thing.

I suppose I carry a great deal of this feeling over into my children as well.  It is just escalated by the fact that we homeschool because homeschoolers already have the label of struggles with socialization.

The very reason I chose to homeschool, in fact, has to do with the amazing impression my husband and I received from an 8-year-old homsechooler.  She sat poised and spoke to us like an adult throughout a business meeting we were having with her mother.  At the end of the meeting, I knew I wanted to homeschool.

But, the vision I have always had for my homsechooled children is probably unrealistic at best as I quite often feel like an epic fail.

When I pictured homeschooling, I pictured the young violin virtuoso, the math whizzes, the spelling bee champs, the Bible Bee scholars and young Junior Achievement computer geniuses.  At the very least, I pictured children with an insatiable hunger to learn and devour knowledge.

Then, I look at my homeschool.  I look at me as a parent.  And, often I see epic fail!  This week has been one of the worst.

We have been struggling to find my daughters a new dance teacher after their much-loved dance teacher announced her resignation in June.  This has been an emotional search, and we finally landed on a studio.  The dance teacher and owner of this studio must think I'm just your basic loony case.

We were all set to visit a dance lesson to see if my oldest daughter liked it when she fell apart.  Tears flowed.  It was a mess.  So, I told the teacher we would not be visiting that night.  The teacher was pleasant and understanding, and suggested that we use her younger sister's class as a way to ease her into it and get her excited.  I thought that was a great idea thinking that the younger class would be so exciting.  Well, my younger daughter went along with it as the older daughter looked on.  Neither child barely cracked a smile and my youngest daughter announced to me that she was bored.

But, what does the teacher say?  "I had no idea how shy your girls were!"  Shy?  You could have used any word.  Why did you choose shy?  I was upset and let the teacher know all of both of my daughters' accomplishments at their previous dance studio, in an effort to express how non-shy they really are.

(By the way, my unsocialized shy child is the one in the front...Does she look shy to you?)

Eventually, my older daughter decided she liked the teacher well enough to give the new studio a try.  My youngest daughter, however, mostly agreed to go along for peace.  She is still warming up to the place.

So, the brings us to last night:

Last night was costume measuring night.  It was a night filled with announcements of scheduled dates and taking measurements to order the proper dance costumes.  When we walked in, my daughter was greeted by another little girl's mother who said, "Oh, I like your boots".  My daughter had on light-up Disney princess cowboy boots and they truly are cool.  Expecting my daughter to say, "thank you", I was taken back when there was silence.  So, I said, "Oh, did you tell her thank you."  To my horror, there was still dead air.  I looked down at my daughter who was now clinging to the side of my leg and staring straight forward like a zombie.  I tried once more to get a "thank you" out of her and got nothing but a cold stare forward.  I can't tell you how much I wanted to sink into my chair.  I was shocked at her apparent rudeness.  But, that was just the beginning.

As the teacher gathered the girls around to announce show dates and show them their costumes, my daughter began to slowly shrink back from all socialization whatsoever.  She sat in the semi-circle of girls who were all looking at the teacher. Only, my daughter was bent over with her head in her hands and hair completely flipped forward as if she were either crying or sleeping.  The teacher tried to get her to look up and pay attention, but she refused.  She spent the bulk of the rest of the night in that position until the costumes were announced.  And, at least she looked up for the big announcement even though there wasn't any shouts of excitement or even a crack of a smile.

I was devastated.  All I could think was, "Please, please - No one ask me what school she goes to," because if I had to answer, "Oh, we homeschool."  I knew immediately what the reaction would be to that - "Oh, of course she looks completely cut off from society and bored and won't sit and look at the teacher like the rest of the girls in the group - She's not properly socialized."

Ugh!

It is moments like these that make me feel like I'm living a major homeschool epic fail.  Where have I gone wrong?

I asked her about her behavior later, and she responded:  "Well, I'm just not used to that place yet."

If you would have seen this child just 20 minutes earlier, you would have thought she was quite rowdy and certainly not afraid to express herself.  She was dancing and singing through a store, playing and talking loudly all day.  Her laughter drifted throughout the room earlier in the day when she was not at dance sitting in a group and being asked to listen or even being talked to with a compliment.  The difference was striking.

There Still are Good People Everywhere by Lynea Gillen

There is good news after all.  This new book by Lynea Gillen is refreshing in more ways than the title, Good People Everywhere, suggests.

This book is a sweet child's bedtime book, a fantastic way to start the day book, a pick-me up in the middle of the day book and an all around mood lifter anytime you need encouragement.

The book's author, Lynea Gillen, knew there was a way to influence young children in a way that counterbalances the bad news heard everyday.  She decided to write a book about all the good that people do.  Focus on the good, and don't dwell on the bad.

The book begins talking about how, in neighborhoods all over the world, people are doing good.  It then walks through colorful illustrations, provided by Kristina Swarner, of everday people doing good.

You will see carpenters, chefs and school teachers.  But, what I loved was how she included midwives as well as doctors and gave credit to mommies who cook and take care of their children as well as workers in other industries.  I love how she includes a teenager doing good, as the teen years are so often attributed to nonsense and a time of self absorption instead.

At the end of the book, she challenges the reader to do good by asking, "I wonder what you will do?"  Following this is a "Good Person" Award your child can personalize and an invitation to visit www.ThreePebblePress.com for more home and school activities.

12 Reasons to Homeschool - What's Yours?

I saw this article today:

12 Most Compelling Reasons to Homeschool

I thoroughly enjoyed it and the concept behind it.  In the process of exploring the article, it made me start to think:  Why do I homeschool?

If you haven't asked yourself this question, you've - no doubt - been asked it from a stranger.  I will never forget the dropped jaw look on one asker's face when I responded that I homeschool because of Socialization.

Yes, sometimes it's a little fun to offer a shocking answer just to see the response.  However, there is truth to my reply.  I do firmly believe that homeschooling is the only environment where I can properly socialize my children.  I do not personally see any socializing benefit in plopping 30 same-age students into a classroom.  I do, however, see the benefit in crowd and lesson control in this classroom scenario.

But, socialization to me goes beyond just relating to your peers.

I often hear how homeschooled children are way too sheltered, and how will they ever learn to make it in the "real world"?  This question is so funny to me.  They are already in the "real world".  It is the group of 30 children sitting behind a desk among only children their own age (some even only among same age and same gender) who are not learning how to function in the real world.  Not even a jury of your peers provides for this much in similarity.

Homeschooled children, on the other hand, interact with all aged people.  And, this is what inspired me to homeschool long before my children were even ever conceived.  My husband and I sat through a business meeting with a woman, who happened to bring along her 8 year old daughter.  This little girl is the one who inspired me to homeschool.  She sat poised and happy throughout the entire meeting - not squirming or complaining or pulling out a handheld electronic game.  She even - *gasp* - interacted with us (the adults).  At the end of the meeting, I commented on how well this child handled conversation with adults.  Since the meeting was with a woman who worked part-time at a private Christian school, I had assumed her daughter also attended this school.  Wrong!  To my amazement, the girl was homeschooled.

The reasons behind why I homeschool may differ from my favorite benefits that come from homeschooling.  While I homeschool for socialization reasons (among which also include laying an adequate Christian foundation for my children), I find additional benefits in homeschooling as well.  For starters, my favorite benefit is the flexibility it allows me to not only be able to pick up and go at a moment's notice; but also to interject any and all learning tools.

What are your reasons to homeschool?  And what is your favorite benefit from homeschooling?

A Positive Note on Homeschool Socialization

I admit it.  I'm a proud mom of 3 kids, whom in my opinion, are amazing.  So, my opinion may be slightly slanted in their favor.  However, something I observed last night sparked a thought that just maybe it happened the way it did because they are homeschooled.

Here's how the story goes:

My two girls take dance lessons from a teacher I absolutely adore. This woman knows how to keep the songs clean, cheap make up off of the girls' faces, and offer encouragement to make dancing fun while providing proper instruction.  In all the times I have known this dance teacher (my oldest began dancing at age 2 and is now almost 10), I have never seen her lose her cool even when a student pushes and tests her limits.  She remains upbeat and positive.  Last night, something happened.

My two girls are in a class with four other girls, making up 3 sets of sisters.  The idea is that they will present a "sister dance" at the recital.  My girls are 4 1/2 years apart in age and have been homeschooled all of their lives.  The other two pair of sisters are slightly closer in age (roughly 3 years difference in age).  One set of sisters attends public school.  I believe the other set attends a private school.  So, we have a wide representation of educational means.

For ease of understanding, we will call them:

Sister pair A
Sister pair B
And my children - Sister pair C

The dance teacher was giving instruction, to which I noticed the little sister in Sister Pair A was not paying much attention.  I then, looked up to see Sister Pair B's 'lil sis had been crying.  The crying sister soon began to poke at her older sis.  This went on to the point that while they were dancing, little sis would pull away and refuse to even hold hands with her big sister.

I dismissed it as just a little sibling dispute until my attention was drawn to my two girls.  Every step they danced was in complete unison (I'm not exaggerating).  They turned at the same time, and connected in perfect harmony and rhythm.  They smiled and laughed as if they thoroughly enjoyed each other's company.  This was a familiar sight to me because they dance together at home all the time.

After the class was over, the teacher commented to me about how my girls were the only ones who listened to her with complete attention, and they were the only two who were in harmony with each other without forced requests.

I thanked her, but inside I couldn't help but wonder.... Does this have anything to do with the fact that they are together 24/7 and have become good friends - not just sisters?  They do not leave each other to go off to a separate classroom every day.  They are together to build a relationship, from sun up to sun down.

It was just another notch I added to my opinion that socialization in homeschooling is superb and relationship and family building.

• Through homeschooling, my kids are not separated simply because of their age difference.
• Through homeschooling, my kids learn to work together and build each other up  instead of competing ruthlessly with each other.  Yes, this sometimes comes after an argument.  But, the point is that they are given the chance to disagree and work it out and are encouraged to see the good in the other.
• Through homeschooling, my kids get to know each other and deal with conflicts day in and day out.

To me, this is true socialization at its best.

Socialization Car Schooling and Homeschooling Gear

Find my homeschool gear here!

On a lighter note, I have heard about Cafe Press for a long time now. The other day, I decided to design my own merchandise. Rather, tongue in cheek I immediately put together a couple designs that hit home for me and put a smile on my face. One of the hot buttons with homeschoolers is the 'S' word - Socialization! The other is the idea that many don't stay at home when conducting their daily classrooms. After many dance lessons, swimming lessons, tumbling, etc. it dawned on me one day that I did a lot of "Car-Schooling." So, I designed another line of merchandise that involves the idea of car-schooling. There are t-shirts, messenger bags, bibs, onesies, doggie t-shirts, totes, coffee cups and just about anything you can ever want in homeschooling gear. I hope you find something you like.

As a homeschooler, people often ask me why I homeschool. One day when someone asked me, I responded:

Because of socialization! That's why I homeschool!

Of course, I got a very strange look and more questions to follow. But, what I meant by my response was true. Socialization is one of the main reasons why I homeschool. I believe that by homeschooling my children, I can provide for them a solid foundation. If they have a solid foundation and know they are loved, they will develop confidence. Once they develop confidence, they are free to excel at what God has gifted them with. If I throw them into a social environment where there is no encouragement and no loving foundation, they are left to believe their peers' opinions of who they are. I don't believe in throwing my newborn into an ocean full of sharks to teach him to swim. I believe that my elementary education in a public school taught me a lot about standing in line, not making waves, obtaining a hall pass to use the restroom, etc. But, life at home after school as one of four children taught me how to share, that I was loved no matter what and that there was always a shoulder to cry on and a big brother ready to stand up for my causes.

I know there are plenty who will agree with me on this point and many others who will disagree with me. If you disagree, maybe that is because I haven't adequately described my position. Or, maybe it's because we simply disagree. But, if you homeschool because of socialization or if you car-school, take a look at the Cafe Press shop and hopefully it will at least bring a little chuckle to your day!